Komarova Natalia

(aka Smirnova Irina / Volkova Yana (Kurgan, Russia), aka Kopilova Yulia (Ulan-Ude, Russia), aka Repina Tamara (Uzhno-Sakhalinsk, Russia), aka Maria Rogova (Kaliningrad, Russia), aka Fedotova Olga (Kemerovo, Russia), Yureva Olga (Kazan, Russia))

Chelyabinsk, Russia

So.... I will continue about how do I spend my usual day... After the dinner that I have from 12 till 13 I continue to work until 17.30 will come. After that I have my free time. I spend it differently and this is mostly depends from my mood and day of the week but often I simply get to home and take the book and lay down to bad with it. It sounds very prosy but it is really so.That is description of my usual day. I hope that you were not very bored by it!Sorry but I see that I have to go now... It i so pity that I to stop now but I hope to find your answer for me and I'll sure will write you a new letter some later... Sorry I forgot to ask your phone number - I want to do that earlier but forgot at all. If you don't mind I want to call to you to hear your voice and to check up that you are really exist! It sound some crazy may be but I wish to know your phone number! Really!

With every letter to you I feel that something is growing between us. I'm not sure for that what is it but I know that I like you and your letters very much. They make me feel warmer and I feel much better when I read your letter. It is really great to know that you have a good friend at another part of the world.

Yes, at me today birthday. I think, you remember. It is the best holiday mine. I understand quite good that you are really interested in knowing more about me and my life. I'm trying to describe it to you. I will continue this in my next letters to you. It is very hard to write long letters because the ideas are forced down and block each other sometimes. For example I want to write about one thing but at the end write about another. I hope this is not very bother you. Some words about the weather here. It is very windy today and the weather is some gloomy but nevertheless it does not make me feel bad. I think that the weather does not influence very much for me. I have seen with my mom yesterday and told her about you, about the fact that I found a friend at USA. Firstly she was shocked to hear about this but when I told her about that you are very good she agreed that it is very good and interesting to write with American man. She is very good and always understand me very good. We are in very good relations. She asked me to pass a warm "Hello" to you to another part of the Earth. I want you to know about my favourite things too. I like many things because I'm very great life-lover. I hope that it is not sounded very wrong! I love life! I love to live! I like to live brighten. I like vivid colors. I like bright things. I like sun! I like summer. I like snow. I like to sky. I like to dance. I like to go to dancing. I like to go to night clubs to dance there for the hole night not thinking about how difficult it will be to wake in the next mourning to go to work. I like different kinds of music and dance music is not the only I love! I love classic music very much! It make me very calm and when listening to it I began to understand that the life is something best that was given us from higher states, from God. I think that I'm enough religious girl. I am christian as you understand. I was learned to respect God in face of Christ and I read Bible too. It is a very great book I think - it learns how to live not regreting that you live so. This was given to me by my granny - father's mom. She was great woman but she died five years ago. I respected her strongly! By the way you want you can tell me a little about your religion too. And else I want to know more about your favourites: color, music, things etc.. If you want you can tell me more about your best friends, about how is the life there in USA. Do you like to dance? I want to know more about you too! I think that it is great that I decided to write to you! I feel that I did good thing! I like you and I hope that I am liked by you. I hope to hear from you extremely soon. Good bye for now...

Hi my close friend M.!

I'm so glad to write an answer to you again. It takes to me a great pleasure to read your letters and to know that someone far away waits for mine too.

I feel happy to find news from you my dear friend!

Birthday has passed very well, to me there came mine girlfriends on job. We have sat at my place. They have wished me happy birthday. All was wonderful. I very much would would like to invite you to my birthday, you were in my ideas.

As you understand it has come cold here. The weather is very fine and clear air gives fresh feeling of freedom when going through the street. That kind of the weather is my best in the winter - it is frosty but very-very clear and very specific - even I can't describe by words.

With each letter between us I feel that firstly called feeling between us is growing and becoming stronger. It is very strange to understand the fact that two people can feel closer without even ever meeting but it is really so!!! My girlfriend at work began to mark that I'm a little differ from mine else several weeks ago. She said that I became more looking happier and having fun in every moment of life. And I fell that I changed my mind too after acquaintance with you. It is really great that I feel so!!!

And you know... I feel that I have a great desire to come to USA to see you in reality. It may sound a little crazy but I really would love to meet you some day, to say you "Hallo" in person, to shake your hand. It should be so romantic meeting!!! But from another side it seems to be crazy dream only - you see - we live so far apart that it makes me unhappy that such a usual girl as me have no chance to move there where she want as easy as it is possible in fantasies... But from dreams to reality...

I finally forgot to give you my address you can write me a letter through usual mail.

It is following:

Natasha Komarova

183002, Russia,

city of Chelyabinsk

Lermontov street, 36a - 139.

In turn I'd love to know yours. I'll be really glad to send you the letter by mail. So if you don't against I want you to send me your mail address. OK?

>I could miss it in on of your last letter. If you sent it already please don't angry for me but simply resent it to me. I'll wait!

My usual life is very close to work and I love it in own way. I have many dialogues there, I see many people and as it is not strange I feel very tired usually after I come home. I have a very cosy flat I live in Here are many toys. I love toys! I even sleep with one of the most favorite. It is brown bear - nice and thick and very funny!!! His name is Kosolapyi. Sorry it is very difficult to spell Russian name in English and I'm not sure that I made it quite right.

I'd love to tell you else about my first love. He was a boy of my age. His name is Andrey. I loved him so... so... But our love story finished very sad. He exchanged me for the career. He is gone to Africa to the city of Cairo and live there now. I suffered so much. I loved him. We were meeting for almost two years but he drop as... I can't recall this without tears.

I almost forgot it. t happened a year before now I found you in so far!! I hope that you are not bored with my stories? It seemed to me that I feel for you growing feelings. What is it - I don't know. I think that the time will show!!! But you can't deny the fact that our hearts becoming closer. I hope that I don't make a mistake thinking this. I really feel somethin new in my soul!

I'll finish now. I spent too much time already at the computer but for the final I'd love ask some questions. If you don't want you may not to answer them.

Firstly I'd love to know about your first romantic love. Who was she? Was she beautiful? Why did you get apart? You may tell me more about American women. I can't imagine them. It's really hard for simple Russian girl. Else I want you to tell me how do you feel about our future. Is there any chance for us to meet

So I'll stop this long letter. I hope to here from you more... Natasha. mailto:tinki@pisem.net0

Natasha's Letter - March 21, 2002 - She is in love and plans to come to the USA

Mmm... I want to tell you about why am I still alone... It is really hard here to find a man I want to be with. It may seem to be whim but it's not so. It is really poor here with good men. I can't describe it correctly but it seems to me that Russian man don't want to find their half in me. It is not good experience of changing boyfriends often but I come through it and it is all false. I hate that period of my life. I was crazy and finished at all to make mistakes in this life. Now I decided to find the man in other country and it happened that I decided to find him in USA. It was always my dream to marry American man. Of course that wish was mostly subconscious but finally I was advised to try to write to American man and I feel that make a good thing. I like what's happening to me last days. It is so new to me!.. But I have known a little about how can I come to you. The most important is to get the foreign passport and visa to visit. It is not easy as have heard and but I think that there's no impossible things in the world. The most important is great wish and will to do what you want. I will speak with mother about this but firstly I need to know what do you think about this. I have learned that the cost of making all papers for me will totally cost about 200 US dollars but I'll learn it more better if you want. All this letter is so spontaneous but from the deep of my heart. I want to know what do you think about what I said to you in it.

Is it really love - how do you think? This feeling makes me so strong and courageous. But in deep of the heart I'm afraid to read your answer. I want to love but what future will show?... I need to know your answer!!! I wish for you to answer me as soon as you can. I love you. It is a little part of me. I'm finishing at this...

I waited for the moment when I can receive your letter again and to write to you my answer and this happy moment has come!!! Now and I can find out what do you think of my previous letter. I will call to Moscow to the American embassy to learn more particularly about the visa. I shall inform you about results later. Unfortunately I do not have friends which have left for America, but I hope that I can learn details myself. It seems that we are so close that we as the husband and the wife. Only unfortunately divided huge distance so much. But nevertheless we should continue to love each other and to trust each other.Do you agree with me?

I can't do nothing with myself, it is love. It sings in me as a bird in the spring sky. I think that it is destiny. It can be dangerous, but I am madly in love with you. Your letters are filled with such heat and care. And the tears of pleasure sometimes run from my eyes.

I thank to my God have helped me to find my only man and I hope that we will be together with you and we'll be very happy. I dream of our meeting and about as we shall walk with you keeping our hands together, as we shall look one at another and as we shall make love. I LOVE YOU, I WANT YOU, YOU FOR EVER IN MY HEART, IN MY IDEAS. I dream as you will carry me on hands, to embrace me, to kiss and caress my gentle body. It's a pity that that's only dreams and if is it fated to them to come true God knows only. I shall call to my aunt who works at the international airport, she works there and she can find out about how much money it will be need for the ticket to you to USA for the plane.

I'll try to find out as much as possible about that how to arrive to you and to meet you. I do not have enough patience to wait for this light moment in our life. I want to meet you more soon to jump to you on a neck, to kiss you, to look into your eyes and to tell you that I LOVE YOU!!!!!!! When you are far apart I feel lonely, you are necessary for me. Ideas about our fast meeting heat my soul, they support me when I'm in bad mood and make me happy.

(compare this paragraph with one of the letters of Lebedeva Tatyana - E.G) My girlfriend Katya have noticed that I began to look happier and cheerful. I am so happy that I have you. My love boils as a volcano woken by god Eros. It tries to escape outside but does not find an exit in absence of you. I wait for our meeting, as the young schoolgirl of the first appointment in her life. I think that I am like Juliette who waits for a meeting with her beloved Romeo!!!But I hope that our love story will be more happy than story of Romeo and Juliette :-))

The stars will shine only for us!!!! They will smile looking as two people can't find a word to describe such a great feeling arisen between us!

Is it a love as great Shakespire describe?!!! I believe in this love and do you my love? I must say to you that I'm not a virgin already - it is hard to be understood but I feel that I was to say you about this! It has happened firstly with Andrey. I hope you remember I told you about him. It was fantastic night - one of the best nights in my life but it is so hard to remember this because he broke my heart... I feel - all I said was so sentimental... I hope I don't bother you yet...

p.s. Please sorry that I still didn't find complete information about the visa for me but I'll do it until next letter anyway!!!

I heard there are many events when girls from Russia got Tourists visas and after that got married and stayed abroad. So I think that we can be together too! How do you think? Am I right?

I have known about total cost of preparing of all papers I need to come to USA. It has appeared more than 200 USD as I said before. It is needed 285 USD to make everything: visa, applications and passport. It is big sum of money that I can't get in even several months. I hope that you can help me to find that kind of money to make our dream come true.

By the way I can get my visa in already two weeks! I was so pleased to hear this! It means that we can meet so soon as I didn't ever dreamed! I'm really happy to know that!

So I need 285 dollars as soon as it will be possible for you to send. I hope that I don't ask too much from you! You can send them through the system Western Union. When you will send the money they will give you Money Transfer Control Number (MTCN). This is ten digits. If you send me that MTCN by e-mail I can get your money at my bank here in Russia. I'll give you the adress of Western Union here in Chelyabinsk that best of all to get for me: Natasha Komarova

Another important information is that I need information about the closest airport to you. This information will help to get the ticket with big discount! This was asked by my aunt . She promised for me to make this good deal and can't express thanks to her for this!

As you see I speak too much about money. I hate this world for it is controlled by the money! But without your help I will never see you! Unfortunately we are to pay to be together! It's so pity! I'd love to fly to you simply with help of my love-wings that carry me in my dreams about I will meet you and we will live together forever until death!!! I love you so much! My parents were not very good with that idea for us to be together firstly. They thought it is so far and dangerous! But I convinced them to let me be with my beloved and they agree with me at the end. All my friends wish for me to be the happiest girl in the world to be together!!!

Sorry if I may be offend you asking the money. But I hope that in your next letter I'll read very good news for us my love!

I could tell you for hours on end of the love I have for you, it is s strong and never ending, I find that I now look forward to what awaits for me in the future because you are their with me, because of your love, you have made the days of dreading the tomorrows disappear. I want only to make you happy, to dance with you in times of joy, comfort you in times of sorrow, make love to you in times of heated passion, to care for you when you are hurt, to make the trouble of the world vanish and fill your heart with my love.

I sometimes wonder if you will become disappointed with things after we are united, my life is not always peaches and cream, I must make the money I have, stretch to make ends meet. I only hope that the love we have shall overcome the trying times, because I love you so very much and do not wish to ever loose you.

I have a dream of us, I see us as we cimb upon the motorcycle to see the sights of where you live, to feel the freedom of the open road as it courses through our bodies, not knowing where the journey will take us, not careing as long as we are together, the smell of summer is in the air and the wind brushes our hair, you show me the beauty of the mountains, and the wonders of the lakes and streams around us. We stop close to the shore of the lake so that we might cool ourselves in the refreshing waters, we laugh as we childishly play in the cool waters, then we come to rest upon the beach to take in the beauty that surrounds us, the moon glows and the stars blanket us, I lay next to you, to warm you, as your body glistens from the cool nights swim, I kiss you as I look deeply into your loving eyes, your heart warms me as it beats next to mine, your love is so tender yet so passionate, we melt into each others arms as we become one, I feel that I can not get enough of you, every minute with you is a new and wonderous minute, I wish to give you pleasure as you have never known before, I love you so very much. I anxiously await the golden moment when we shall finally meet.

I am very happy also I to write to you about love. Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses. Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future, and it doesn't brood over the past. It's the day-in and day-out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories, and working toward common goals. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you don't have it, no matter what else there is, it's not enough.

I love you as much as the sunny loves our little planet Earth we live at!!! I can't wait our meeting in person. I miss you as the desert waits for the rain!!! Sorry I have few time to write to you. I must go away now.